integration for type 4

wing 3 integration

immature type fours can be deeply self-absorbed and unaware of their impact on people. they’re not aware that they’re experiencing emotion more deeply than most, and that their hysteria will not make others change in the ways that they want. by integrating their type three wing, they become more driven by outcomes than their own emotional interior. they become more action oriented, and this action/goal orientation prompts them to watch their mental states in order to keep more consistent and higher energy levels, rather than spill energy in emotional reactivity. they become more confident and more willing to be highly visible, and are more able to express themselves in ways that are inspiring to others. they remain authentic but become less dramatic.

wing 5 integration

integrating their type five wing allows the type four to be more objective and analytical. this provides a counterpoint to their deeply emotional manner of relating with others. they now see situations from a less reactive viewpoint and have more self-restraint. the type four can now add knowledge-depth to balance their feeling-depth. the integrated type four therefore takes things less personally and attains balance between attachment and non-attachment.

release point

integrating mature type 1 qualities

the virtue of type four is equanimity, which means calmness or coolness under pressure. an equanimous person diligently meets the challenges of life as they come, maintaining a level head and even emotions. because type fours have a deep connection to emotion, this virtue can be difficult to attain but, when attained, allows type fours deep release. unlike the immature type four, type ones are diligent, self-critical, and perfectionistic. type fours can lack these traits because their emotions may lead them all over the place. by gaining understanding of their own emotions, type fours can truly fulfill their desire for an independent personhood. the discipline now allows the type four to be more discerning. they are more objective and sustain a balance in emotional and mental clarity.

stress point

overcoming immature type 2 qualities

when an immature type fours loses control of their own emotions, they appear much like the immature type two. they feel abandoned, becoming needy and demanding. their sense of being broken is enhanced, and they seek fulfillment in others, rather than their own interior. ironically, their emotionality now leads them further away from the individuality they seek, because they have become needy and clingy. you can see that the type four’s maturity would have to be advanced to overcome their reaction in stressful circumstances. this process can only be created when type fours attend to their self-regulation and self-awareness. mature type fours are more deeply attuned with others and become more consistent and less reactive in their responses.

non-resourceful state

when type fours are under stress, they exaggerate their moods, feel misunderstood and hurt, and withdraw. they turn their anger or blame on themselves and spiral into depression. they get stuck in their feelings, instead of letting their feelings energize them into constructive action. the denial of their own needs, and a tendency to help others instead of dealing with their own pain, can cause them to become suffering servants.

resourceful state

when type fours are in a resourceful or relaxed state, they seek and find wholeness within themselves. they feel connected to their real feelings, rather than abandoning themselves in their hysterical feelings. they stay in the present and realize that they have all they need to be perfectly happy right now, and that nothing is broken or lacking. they re-own their goodness, and take an action-oriented, problem-centred approach. now more objective, they stay with the facts and don’t exaggerate their emotional response or amplify the stimuli. they maintain their earned equanimity. in the latest stages of maturity, type fours feel deep connection and belonging in this moment, by themselves or with others. they feel at home and contented. “i am, and so i am both unique (in form) and universal, (in essence)” replaces “i am special, therefore i am somebody.”

recommendations for type 4

• do not pay so much attention to your feelings — they are not a true source of support for you, as you probably already know. one of the most important mistakes type fours make is to identify fully with their feelings. the fallacy is that to understand themselves they must understand their feelings, and particularly the negative ones, before acting. type fours do not see that the self is not the same as its feelings, or that the presence of negative feelings does not preclude the presence of good in themselves, others, or the environment. always remember that your feelings are telling you something about yourself as you are at this particular moment, and not about your total being.
• avoid putting things off until you are “in the right mood.” commit yourself to productive, meaningful work that will contribute to your good and that of others, no matter how small the contribution may be. working consistently in the real world will create a context in which you can discover yourself and your talents. type fours are often happiest when working — that is, activating their potential and realizing themselves. you will not “find yourself” in a vacuum or while waiting for inspiration to strike, so connect — and stay connected — with the real world.
• self-esteem and self-confidence will develop only from having positive experiences, whether or not you believe that you are ready to have them. therefore, put yourself in the way of good. you may never feel that you are ready to take on a challenge of some sort. you may always feel that you need more time. type fours typically never feel that they are sufficiently “together,” but they can nevertheless have the courage to stop putting off their lives and learn from taking small steps.
• a wholesome self-discipline takes many forms, from sleeping regular hours to working regularly to exercising regularly, and has a cumulative, strengthening effect. since it comes from yourself, a healthy self-discipline is not contrary to your freedom or individuality. on the other hand, sensuality, excessive sexual experiences, alcohol, drugs, sleep, or fantasizing have debilitating effects on you, as you already know. expand your self-awareness, and practice healthy self-discipline.
• avoid lengthy conversations in your imagination, particularly when they are negative, resentful, or excessively romantic. these conversations are essentially imaginary and, at best, only rehearsals for action — although, as you know, you almost never say or do what you imagine you will. instead of spending time imagining your life and relationships, have the courage to live your life and learn from your experiences.

summarized from Riso & Hudson, Lapid-Bogda